


if this was a romance movie

by Spikedluv



Series: Dec 2017 Gift Fic [8]
Category: Jurassic Park III (2001), Primeval
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Background Pairing: Alan/Billy, First Time, Fix-It, M/M, Minor Character: Evan Cross, Minor Character: Hillary Becker, Minor Character: James Lester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-12
Updated: 2018-01-12
Packaged: 2019-03-04 00:02:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13352271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spikedluv/pseuds/Spikedluv
Summary: Nick and Stephen still aren’t talking, but that changes when they’re both sent to testify before the UN Conference on Anomalies.





	if this was a romance movie

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MistressKat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MistressKat/gifts).



> ~Takes place at some indeterminate time after the events of season 2 (some of which have played out differently for purposes of this fic). 
> 
> ~I somehow managed to place Primeval in the same ‘verses as Jurassic Park 3 and the MCU (though the latter is just a fun nod). 
> 
> ~This story is one of my December Gift Fic and was written for Kat_lair for the prompt _Primeval, Nick/Stephen, first-time, conference trip...._ I hope you enjoy it!!
> 
> ~I’m also using this to fill the _First Time/Last Time_ square on my card for Round 10 of [Trope Bingo on DW](http://trope_bingo.dreamwidth.org).
> 
> ~Posted: January 12, 2018

Anomalies had begun opening around the world. Some of the nations weren’t equipped to deal with predators from hundreds of millions years ago, or the future predators Nick and his team had run into. There was also the concern that someone might try to create a weapon out of the creatures as Helen had done, or try to affect the future by causing changes to the past.

Training was required, as were rules regarding how to deal with the anomalies and the creatures that came through them, so the United Nations announced a week-long series of conferences. Nick was looking forward to a week without Lester looking over his shoulder. His peace was short-lived. Lester informed him that, as the closest thing they had to an expert on the dinosaurs and the anomalies, Nick would be attending the conference with Lester to answer questions.

Nick’s protest fell on deaf ears. It appeared to Nick that Lester took great satisfaction in informing him that Stephen would also be attending.

“The two of you made a good team once,” Lester said. “For the good of the country, and the world, Cutter, suck it up.”

Nick hadn’t seen Stephen much after their falling out. While Nick continued to lead the team, Stephen had been given the task of training up a second team. Despite the number of times he’d turned to tell Stephen something, or wished for Stephen’s experience with a tranquilizer gun, Nick refused to admit, even to himself, that he missed Stephen.

Nick went looking for Stephen now. It would be better if the first time they spoke again occurred before they boarded the flight to New York City. After asking around, Nick found Stephen in the gym. He and Captain Becker were watching a group of recruits train with some of Becker’s men.

Sweat darkened Stephen’s shirt and sheened his skin, proof that he’d also been working out prior to Nick’s arrival. Nick dragged his attention away from Stephen and onto the recruits. On the theory that it would be easier to teach paleontologists already used to expeditions the requisite amount of self-defense than to cram years of dinosaur knowledge into the brains of soldiers already familiar with the anomalies, they’d recruited their first batch of trainees from several universities.

When Nick thought he could look at Stephen without that familiar ball of _something_ in his gut, he moved his gaze back to the two men. Becker caught Nick’s eye and nodded before resuming his conversation with Stephen. Having been spotted there was nothing for it but to join them and get this over with.

“Captain Becker,” Nick greeted when he reached them. “Stephen.”

“Professor Cutter,” Becker said politely.

Stephen’s, “Cutter,” held a hint of wariness.

Becker either didn’t notice, or did notice and wanted nothing more than to be elsewhere. He excused himself and stopped to offer some words of advice to each recruit.

“What do you want, Cutter?” Stephen said. He held himself tight and away from Nick.

Nick missed the closeness they used to share, even as he told himself he was in the right here. It was cold comfort.

“You’ve heard about the UN Conference on Anomalies,” Nick said.

Stephen nodded.

“Lester informed me this morning that you and I will also be attending,” Nick said. “For our ‘expertise’,” he added when Stephen’s brow furrowed in question.

“Why does he need both of us?”

“I asked him that myself,” Nick said.

“I’m sure you did. He can’t possibly think it’s a good idea to remove his two senior members and leave the team in the hands of Connor and Abby.”

“That appears to be his plan. Perhaps he also plans to use some of your recruits,” Nick said.

“They don’t have enough field experience,” Stephen said.

“I doubt you can get Lester to change his mind, but you’re welcome to try.”

“Is that why you’re telling me?” Stephen said. “So I can try to convince Lester where you failed?”

“Not at all, Stephen,” Nick said, tamping down on his exasperation. “I just thought we could ease some of the awkwardness if we spoke before we left.”

Stephen was silent for a moment, then said, “Thanks for the heads up, Cutter.”

It was a dismissal, and since Nick couldn’t think of anything to say that wouldn’t lead to the same old argument, he merely said, “You’re welcome, Stephen,” and walked away.

~*~

Nick saw Stephen more in the weeks leading up to the conference than he had in the past few months. Seeing Stephen woke the ache in Nick that had merely been lying dormant, but Stephen was correct – the recruits needed more field experience.

Each time the team went out Stephen and at least two recruits joined them. While they were mainly there to observe, a couple times they were called into service. One recruit, Sheila, got the opportunity to step through an anomaly to the Jurassic in order to help them return a nest of Stegosaurus eggs, and another, Bryan, ended up in the infirmary in need of stitches to a gash in his leg when he got too close to a Triceratops they were trying to heard back through another anomaly.

In both cases they were more determined than ever to remain with the ARC.

“Were we ever that wide-eyed?” Nick said.

“Connor was wide-eyed enough for both of us,” Stephen said.

Nick couldn’t disagree.

~*~

Nick had several meetings with Connor and Abby. Taking a page out of Stephen’s book, Nick started asking the two of them to make command decisions when they were in the field in case they were forced to do so while he was gone. Only once had he been required to step in to countermand one of their orders.

Before they left for the conference Nick gathered his team and the new recruits together for a meeting that Abby had taken to calling a pep rally. Nick’s speech didn’t include enough ‘pep’ if Abby’s expression was anything to go by. Stephen attended with his recruits, but he stayed to the side and, after an initial greeting, didn’t make eye contact with any of them.

Nick wanted to speak with Stephen one more time before the flight, but when he looked for him Sheila informed Nick that Stephen had already left. Nick stepped out of the conference room and saw Stephen down the hall.

Stephen stopped when Nick called his name, but there was a beat before he turned around when Nick thought he might continue walking. Stephen waited silently while Nick approached and suddenly this was harder than he’d thought it would be.

His plan had been to strike up a conversation with Stephen after the meeting in whatever organic method presented itself at the time. Now they were in the hallway, alone, with no obvious conversation started or a buffer of old and new team members.

“Are you set for the flight?” Nick said.

Stephen raised an eyebrow. “I’m not the one who waits until the last minute to pack.”

“No,” Nick said. “You’ve probably been packed for a week.”

The corner of Stephen’s eye twitched.

“Two?” Nick guessed.

“I did talk to Lester,” Stephen said in lieu of an answer. “It looks like we’re stuck with each other for a week. But New York City is large enough that I’m sure we won’t need to see each other outside the conference.”

Nick had been the one to push Stephen away, so he didn’t know why it felt like the wind had been knocked out of his sails. “Right,” he said.

“Well, since I’m sure you won’t be asking me to help you pack, you’d better get on that.”

“Yeah,” Nick said, and helplessly watched Stephen walk away.

~*~*~*~

Lester was inside the suite when Nick and Stephen arrived at the Hilton New York Grand Central, which had been touted as an eight minute walk from Grand Central, but which took them longer than that to navigate. In part because they kept stopping to stare, Nick wasn’t ashamed to admit. Lester had gotten an earlier flight (and probably first class) so he could be there when the conference opened. Nick and Stephen had been able to wait an extra day.

Lester glanced up from the papers he was reading. Other documents were scattered over the couch and coffee table. “Welcome to New York,” he said sourly. “I’d like you both to take a look at these documents once you’ve settled in.” Lester indicated the door behind him. “My room.” He pointed to another door. “Your room.”

Nick waited for Lester to point out a third door. When he didn’t, and in fact had returned to his papers and ignored their presence, Nick headed towards the room he’d apparently be sharing with Stephen. They’d shared worse (and closer) quarters on more than one expedition, but Nick still had to bite back a sigh of relief when he pushed the door open to reveal two double beds.

Nick automatically chose the bed furthest from the door because Stephen was the better shot. He froze when he realized what he’d done, but Stephen didn’t appear to have noticed. He’d dropped his bags on the other bed and was surveying their room.

“Even without taking into account that it’s part of a suite, this room is nicer than my apartment.”

Everything was understated enough that Nick knew it was expensive. Nick caught himself staring at Stephen and dragged his eyes away. “You want to use the bathroom first?”

“Go ahead,” Stephen said. “I’m going to unpack.”

Stephen turned to his bags and Nick forced his feet to move and carry him to the bathroom, which by itself was nicer than his house. Nick used the toilet, then retrieved his toiletries so he could brush away the stale taste in his mouth and wash away ten hours spent in an airport and cooped up in an airplane from his face.

Nick finished unpacking his bag before Stephen was finished in the bathroom, so he went out to the living room and took the document Lester held out to him. He sat down in a chair that wasn’t covered in papers and began to read. Stephen joined them and Lester only interrupted them once to order food from room service.

Nick had closed his eyes after he’d handed the last document to Stephen. After reading the UN Conference on Anomalies agenda, the list of items drawn up by Ambassador Sawers for training and handling of the anomalies, as well as Lester’s chicken scratch notes from that day’s meeting he could feel a headache coming on.

Lester went over to the door at the knock and Stephen said, “You’ll feel better after you eat something.”

“We ate on the plane,” Nick said.

Stephen snorted and Nick had to agree that what they’d been given had only very loosely resembled food.

~*~

Bedtime wasn’t awkward, mainly because they were both feeling the effects of the time difference. Nick only removed his boots and trousers before falling into bed and couldn’t even recall whether Stephen had bothered getting undressed at all.

The shower was running when Nick woke up. He didn’t want to be there when Stephen came out, so he forced himself to move. Nick grabbed the trousers he’d left lying on the floor and wandered out to the living room in search of caffeine. Lester was already dressed in his suit and starched shirt. Nick ignored him in favor of the smell of coffee.

Only after he’d poured himself a cup and tasted the sweet caffeine nectar did Nick acknowledge Lester. “What time is it?”

“Eight o’clock Eastern Standard Time,” Lester said. “The meeting resumes at nine. I’m heading out now so I can speak with some contacts I made yesterday. You and Stephen might be called on to testify today, so stop by the UN after breakfast and get your credentials.”

Lester left before Nick could do more than nod his agreement. Nick took another sip of coffee, then refilled his cup and poured one for Stephen, fixing it the way he liked. Nick stopped in his tracks when he entered the bedroom he and Stephen shared. Stephen stood in the middle of the room wearing nothing but a towel around his waist. He was using another to dry his hair.

Nick cleared his throat. “Sorry, I . . . thought you’d be dressed by now.”

“It’s fine,” Stephen said.

And it should be, because they’d shared tents and locker rooms, but for some reason it wasn’t.

Stephen gestured towards the cups Nick held. “One of those for me?”

“Yes,” Nick said, glad to have something to do that wasn’t starting at the single drop of water hanging precariously off Stephen’s collarbone. He held out one cup, realized it was the wrong one and pulled it back just as Stephen reached for it. “Sorry,” Nick said with a huff of nervous laughter.

Nick glanced away when Stephen took a sip of coffee, as if he’d never seen Stephen drink from a cup before. “Lester’s just left,” he told Stephen, and relayed Lester’s instructions.

“Alright,” Stephen agreed easily.

When Stephen moved towards his dresser Nick broke for the bathroom. “I’m just gonna . . .”

The privacy of the bathroom was a sanctuary until Nick imagined Stephen in the shower. He washed quickly and peeked into the bedroom to make sure it was empty before going out to get dressed.

Stephen was sitting on the couch when Nick exited the bedroom. He waved a room service menu at Nick. “We could order breakfast or go out. Unless you’d rather eat alone.”

Nick bit back his first response that of course they would eat together, realizing that they hadn’t eaten or done anything else together in months. “Together’s fine,” Nick said. “Let’s go out. We’re going to be spending enough time in this suite.”

Besides, he wanted to get a look at this part of New York City. They got their jackets and headed out.

In the elevator Stephen said, “I checked in with Becker. It’s been quiet so far.”

“Good,” Nick said. “Did you speak to Connor or Abby?”

Stephen gave Nick a look, but merely said, “No.”

“What was that look for?”

“I haven’t spoken to Connor or Abby since I left the team, Cutter,” Stephen said.

“What?” Nick knew he hadn’t spoken with Stephen, but he didn’t realize that neither Connor nor Abby had. Nick just thought they didn’t talk about it in front of him.

“The kids choose you in the divorce,” Stephen said wryly. The doors opened and he stepped out of the elevator.

Nick gaped for a moment, then hurried through the lobby after Stephen. Nick didn’t know what to say to that, and by the time he caught up to Stephen on the sidewalk any attempt to address the comment felt awkward. That didn’t stop Nick from thinking about it, though.

They walked three blocks down 2nd Avenue to East 45th Street and turned right. The walk was quiet, but it wasn’t an uncomfortable silence. Nick looked around them while Stephen read the map and led the way.

At this hour the tables weren’t full, but Stephen headed for the counter anyway. Nick ordered the spinach and feta omelet, and Stephen got the breakfast burrito. They both ordered coffee. Nick paid for the meal with the ARC credit card after they’d eaten, and they began the walk back down East 45th Street towards the United Nations Plaza.

Nick and Stephen showed their ID and got their UN credentials. They hadn’t heard from Lester, so Nick didn’t know if they should wait in the lobby to hear if they’d be called on to testify before the UN today. Before he had to make a decision, a young man with scars on his neck approached them.

“Excuse me,” the young man said. “Are you here for the Conference on Anomalies?”

“Yes,” Nick said. “Are you, as well?”

The young man smiled and extended his hand. “Yes, hi. Billy . . . Dr. William Brennan,” he corrected, as if hearing someone’s voice in his ear. “I’m with the Anomalies Department of the Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics Division.”

Nick raised an eyebrow. “That’s quite a mouthful.”

The corners of Dr. Brennan’s lips quirked. “So we’ve been told. Welcome to New York.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Dr. Brennan. I’m Nick Cutter, and this is my colleague, Stephen Hart.”

“The UK contingent. And just Billy, please.” Billy shook both of their hands and gestured towards the two men standing behind him. “Dr. Alan Grant and Evan Cross. Alan heads the Anomalies Department, and Evan is from the Special Projects Group in Vancouver.”

Nick and Stephen shook hands with the other two men, neither of whom seemed as excited to be there as Billy was. Billy assured them, with Alan’s grumbled agreement, that they probably wouldn’t be called to testify that morning. At Billy’s invitation the five of them headed up East 43rd Street to 2nd Avenue and settled around a table at Ground Central with coffee and, even though they’d just eaten breakfast, pastries.

The five of them shared stories about their experiences with the anomalies. None of the others had encountered the future predators yet, so Nick and Stephen filled them in on the creatures. They discussed their theories on how the anomalies worked. When Nick brought up the matter of making sure all the dinosaurs were returned through the anomalies unharmed, Cross was silent on the point.

They agreed that, no matter what transpired at the UN conference, they should build a network and share information. Alan grimaced at that, and Billy laughed. 

“Don’t worry,” Billy said, laying his hand on Alan’s arm and leaving it there a beat too long. “I’ll handle the computer work.”

“You don’t like computers?” Nick said, thinking he’d found a kindred spirit. Stephen gave Nick an amused look that he ignored.

“Yes, but that’s not the problem,” Alan said.

“Tech doesn’t like Alan,” Billy said. “He’s like a walking EMP.”

Nick called Connor to get him started on a shareable database and an alert system, and gave him the contact information for their American and Canadian counterparts. The moment Nick ended the call his cell rang again. It was Lester informing him that they wouldn’t be called upon to testify that day, but had been placed on the agenda for the next morning.

Their counterparts received similar phone calls from whoever was attending the conference on their countries’ behalves.

“What are we going to do for a whole afternoon?” Billy said.

“I’d like to go to the American Museum of Natural History since we’re here,” Stephen said.

“The dinosaur exhibit!” Billy said.

Nick bit back a retort that they saw enough live dinosaurs these days. Stephen was smiling at Billy like a kid at Christmas time and Nick couldn’t bring himself to be the one who put a damper on it.

Cross bowed out and the four of them piled into a taxi for the twenty minute drive to the museum.

~*~*~*~

Nick and Stephen met with Lester in the suite after a fun couple of hours exploring the museum. He told them about the trouble they were having coming to an agreement – everyone agreed that the teams dealing with the anomalies needed to be trained, and that the creatures should be sent back unharmed and shouldn’t be weaponized, but everyone had different ideas on how those ends should be accomplished.

Lester had dinner plans with some of the representatives in hopes of creating a coalition that could actually get something done. Nick was glad he didn’t have to sit through those meetings. His impatience would’ve alienated half of the other representatives by now.

Stephen found an Indian restaurant, Darbar, within walking distance from their hotel. They contacted Billy and met him and Alan there. Cross politely declined their invitation, saying that he’d already eaten.

“What’s the story with Cross?” Stephen said after they’d finished their meal.

Billy gave a guilty start.

“What was that for?” Nick said.

“Admitting knowing anything about Evan Cross is an admission that I may have looked him up after we met him yesterday,” Billy said.

“Why don’t we just stipulate that you’ve looked him up and skip the admission,” Nick said dryly, earning a snort from Stephen. When Nick glanced at him, Stephen was focusing intently on the ‘warming after dinner’ coffee, which boasted Cruzan Rum, Jacques Cardin VSOP Cognac, Kahlua, and Haiti-Blue Forest coffee, according to the description in the menu, and pointedly not looking at Nick.

“Fine,” Billy said. He leaned forward and said, “His wife was killed when an anomaly opened and a dinosaur came through.”

“Oh my god,” Nick said. “That’s horrible.”

“Yes,” Alan agreed.

“But?” Stephen said.

“I’m sure you noticed his silence earlier on the issue of sending back the creatures unharmed,” Alan said.

“He does understand the importance of not disrupting the timeline, doesn’t he?” Nick said.

“I’m sure he does,” Alan said. “Doesn’t mean he’s not harboring dreams of finding the dinosaur that killed his wife.”

“You had a similar thing happen, didn’t you?”

“Look me up, too?” Nick said to Billy.

“Didn’t have to,” Billy said. “I’d already read up on you and your team after the first anomaly opened up in the middle of Los Angeles.”

“Our team and the ARC weren’t public knowledge at the time,” Nick said.

“No?” Billy said innocently. “Must’ve been later, then.”

“Hmm,” Nick said. “But to answer your question, no, the same thing didn’t happen to me. Helen is very much alive, and even if she had been killed eight years ago, I wouldn’t have known how.”

“Point taken,” Billy said. “Sorry for bringing it up.”

“Helen’s actually a cautionary tale,” Stephen said. “Of what happens when you try to tamper with the anomalies.”

After that the conversation faltered and they called it a night. It was early, but their bodies still hadn’t adjusted to the time zone. Nick and Stephen had walked to the restaurant, but they took an Uber back to their hotel and fell into bed before Lester returned from his business dinner.

~*~*~*~

Nick laid in the bed a few minutes after he woke, enjoying the warmth beneath the covers and the sound of the water in the shower. When Nick realized that he’d started to imagine Stephen in the shower he got up. Once again Lester was already dressed in a nicely pressed suit. He was sipping tea and reading the news from home on a tablet. Nick and Lester exchanged grunts and Nick poured himself a cup of coffee.

“I’ve got a breakfast meeting,” Lester said. “Be there by ten o’clock. You’ll be called first, then Stephen, then the Americans. Depending on how many questions there are, we probably won’t get through all of you today, and you might be recalled.”

Nick waited until Lester left to make up a second cup of coffee and carry them both into the bedroom. Stephen was half-dressed. He accepted the cup of coffee gratefully and took a sip. He closed his eyes and groaned softly, either at the taste or the first hit of caffeine. Nick had to drag his eyes away from Stephen’s face and, after one moment of weakness, didn’t let them drop back to Stephen’s bare chest.

Nick blamed the stiffness of his cock on the morning and ignored it while he showered. The thought of wanking off in the same shower he shared with Stephen made him feel strange.

Nick and Stephen returned to The Comfort Diner for breakfast and met the others at the UN building afterwards. The five of them waited together until Nick was called.

“Good luck, Cutter,” Stephen said.

Nick felt the touch of Stephen’s hand on his arm the entire time he sat at the front of the room and answered questions. The first thing Nick saw when he stepped into the lobby was Stephen pacing. Nick called his name and Stephen’s feet froze as he looked up.

“What are you doing here? I thought you were at Ground Central with the others.”

“I was,” Stephen said, “but it was taking so long. I thought Lester said it should only take an hour.”

“How long was I in there?”

“Just under two.”

“Felt longer,” Nick said.

Stephen huffed a laugh. “You always hated things like this.”

“People usually ask stupid questions,” Nick said.

“How was it?”

“Fewer stupid questions than usual,” Nick allowed.

While some of the countries might be looking for a way to use the anomalies, many more were attuned to the disaster it would be if the creatures got loose.

Nick answered his phone when it rang with some song he hadn’t been able to identify, which Connor had set as Lester’s ring tone. Nick listened without doing much talking, repocketing the phone when Lester hung up.

“They’re breaking for lunch,” Nick said. “No more questions today, they want to discuss what they heard this morning. Probably refine their questions.”

“Awesome,” Stephen said.

“We’ve got the afternoon off,” Nick said. “What would you like to do?”

Surprise flashed across Stephen’s face, but he merely said, “How about the Central Park Zoo?”

“Sounds good.”

Stephen called Billy’s phone to fill the others in and see if anyone wanted to join them while Nick checked in with the team. All three begged off – Billy and Alan wanted to see the Statue of Liberty; Nick didn’t know what Cross was doing.

Nick and Stephen chose to make the half-hour walk to the Zoo since they’d both been sitting for most of the morning and were used to getting more exercise than they’d gotten the past few days. They took their time walking through the Zoo, but it still didn’t take them much longer than the recommended forty-five minutes.

By then they were both hungry, so Stephen checked his phone for nearby restaurants and they had lunch at Bistro Chat Noir. Nick got the Creole Chicken and Stephen tried the Black Cat Burger with bacon and sweet potato fries.

They opted for a leisurely walk back to the hotel and returned a few minutes before Lester did. As he had the night before, Lester left again as soon as he took a moment to check in with the home office, tell them about the afternoon session, and freshen up. Having eaten a late lunch Nick and Stephen didn’t bother with a large meal for supper. They ordered a plate of fruit that they picked at while Stephen read a book on his tablet and Nick stared at the television screen, not watching the movie playing there.

During their walk to the zoo Stephen had said, “Do you think they’re together, Billy and Alan?”

Nick wasn’t one to pay much attention to that sort of interpersonal thing – he’d been the last one in the department to realize that Professor Saunders was sleeping with his TA – but upon reflection he thought that Stephen might be right. The two men had displayed a closeness that could’ve been explained by working together for so many years and going through an experience like Isla Sorna together, but there was something softer about their interaction.

Now Stephen said, “They’re married.”

“What?” Nick said, pretending that he’d been distracted by the movie rather than the fact that Doctors Grant and Brennan might be in a relationship together.

“Billy and Alan,” Stephen said, waving the tablet at Nick. “They’re married. Billy isn’t the only one who can look someone up.”

Stephen ended his comment on a wry note, but his previous wistful tone gave Nick something else to ponder.

~*~*~*~

The questioning went much faster once Nick’s turn was out of the way. Stephen was questioned the next morning and Alan after lunch. There was a break between their turns so the representatives could discuss what they’d learned from each man. In addition to mostly the same questions they’d asked Nick, Stephen fielded questions about training since he was already involved in setting up such a program for the ARC. Grant was asked about the dangers inherent in letting dinosaurs loose into today’s world.

The five of them ate lunch together and Nick and Stephen kept Billy company while Alan testified. They traded notes on Alan’s questions before separating. Nick and Stephen used the fitness center their hotel offered and took turns showering since neither one of them wanted to test Lester by using his bathroom.

They didn’t feel like going out so they had dinner at the Herb & Kitchen restaurant located in the hotel, and got a drink after at the hotel bar.

“Tell me about Helen,” Nick said, surprising himself nearly as much as Stephen. He didn’t know if his guard was down because of the alcohol or because he’d spent the past few days in Stephen’s company.

“Why now?” Stephen said, a hint of bitterness in his tone reminding Nick of the number of times he’d shot Stephen down when he’d wanted to talk.

The truth was that he hadn’t realized how much he’d missed Stephen until they’d been forced into close proximity again. Nick wasn’t ready to tell Stephen that, though, so he shrugged. “I’m ready now.”

Stephen nodded. He stared into the bottom of his drink long enough that Nick wasn’t sure he was going to speak.

“Helen could be very . . . persuasive,” Stephen said. “She was brilliant, and beautiful, and she had this way of making you feel like you were the center of her world.”

Stephen paused before continuing. Nick didn’t speak, afraid that anything he said would disrupt the delicate balance they’d achieved and derail the conversation they were finally having.

“I was young and stupid enough to fall for it. I knew she was married,” Stephen said, “but I didn’t care. She praised my work and was appreciative of the smallest gesture. Helen wrapped me around her little finger until she was the only thing I cared about. When I was with her I did anything she asked, and when I wasn’t, all I could think about was the next time I’d see her.”

Stephen was breathing fast. Without thinking Nick reached out and laid his hand over Stephen’s. Stephen stared at Nick’s hand a moment before continuing.

“One day she broke up with me. Just said we weren’t working anymore. I was devastated at first, but the more time passed I realized how wrapped up in her I’d become. How unhealthy our relationship had been. I had to repair broken friendships and catch up in classes where I’d slacked off.

“I got over Helen and considered that time a huge mistake. I think Helen realized and saw it as a challenge because she approached me again. That time I was wise enough to turn her down. And then I met you.”

“And you understood why Helen needed to find passion elsewhere?” Nick said in a self-deprecating tone he couldn’t hide.

Stephen’s head jerked up at that and he looked at Nick for the first time since he’d started speaking. “What? No! I wondered why she’d ever cheat on you!” Stephen’s cheeks flushed. “You were . . . pretty impressive. You knew your shit, and you didn’t suffer fools lightly.” Stephen smiled to himself at some memory.

“Most people say I’m grumpy.”

Stephen’s smile widened. “You were never grumpy with me.”

“I’m grumpy with everyone, Stephen. For some reason you just let it wash off your back.”

“Maybe because I saw the marshmallow underneath,” Stephen said.

“You take that back right now, Stephen,” Nick said.

Stephen grinned, then it faded and his eyes held only sadness. “It’s funny, isn’t it? I slept with Helen, but I fell in love with you.”

Nick had trouble breathing. “What?”

Stephen studied Nick. “You didn’t know?”

“Did I act like I knew?”

“I thought you were just being, I don’t know, polite to not acknowledge it.”

“Stephen . . .” Nick didn’t know what else to say.

Stephen pulled his hand out from under Nick’s. “I’m going to go for a walk. Don’t wait up for me.”

“Stephen.”

“Please. Nick. I know I don’t have the right to ask you for anything, but please give me this.”

Nick let Stephen go without another word. He had another drink because he couldn’t imagine returning to the empty suite alone after Stephen had dropped that bombshell. Nick finally forced himself to go through the motions - he returned to the room and sent e-mails to Connor and Abby while listening to the BBC News, then got ready for bed.

Nick was still awake when Stephen returned. He didn’t speak, just listened to Stephen get ready for bed. When the bathroom light was turned off and Stephen was finally tucked into his own bed, Nick relaxed and fell asleep.

~*~*~*~

Nick was up first the next morning despite the fact that he hadn’t fallen asleep until late. He showered and got dressed, and still Stephen didn’t move. Nick didn’t think he was faking it.

Lester raised an eyebrow when Nick stepped out of the bedroom. “Mr. Hart sleep in?”

“I woke up early,” Nick said.

Lester glanced at his watch, calling into question Nick’s definition of ‘early’. He gave Nick a rundown on yesterday’s question periods and the discussion that had followed. Nick told Lester what he’d discovered about Evan Cross to prepare him for some of the things the other man might say in response to the questions put to him.

Nick took a cup of coffee in to Stephen after Lester left. Stephen was still in bed, so Nick set the cup on the bedside table and shook Stephen’s shoulder.

“Rise and shine, Stephen,” Nick said, letting his hand slide across Stephen’s shoulders before he caught himself. Nick left the room so he wouldn’t do anything stupid, knowing the scent of coffee would rouse Stephen better than anything else.

Nick sipped coffee, his hands gripping the cup as he dealt with the realization that they very much wanted to grip something, someone, else, and pretended to watch the news. When Stephen finally emerged from the bedroom looking chagrined and embarrassed, Nick was on the phone with Connor.

“Ah, here’s Stephen now,” Nick said. He stood and handed the phone off to Stephen. “Connor.”

Connor had some questions about the recruits and Nick recalled Stephen’s comment that, aside from the practice missions with the recruits before they left, he hadn’t spoken to Connor or Abby since their . . . Stephen had used the word ‘divorce’, but break-up wasn’t really far from the truth.

While Stephen and Connor spoke, Nick turned off the television and grabbed their jackets. He traded Stephen’s jacket for the phone, shoving it into his pocket. Nick made sure he had his wallet and said, “The diner again this morning, or somewhere else?”

Stephen looked surprised at Nick seemingly ignoring last night’s confession, then recovered. “Diner’s fine.”

Nick wondered if he should be insulted that his not acting like an ass was enough to put such a look on Stephen’s face. All he said, though, was, “Good. I want to see how many things on their menu I can try.”

Stephen snorted, but was otherwise quiet. Nick was forced to resort to small talk to get Stephen to speak.

At the diner Stephen headed for a booth. “I didn’t know if you wanted to talk about . . . last night,” he said at Nick’s look.

“I’m not much of a talker, Stephen, you know that better than anyone.” It was as much of an apology as Nick could manage right now.

The waitress delivered menus and poured coffee into cups already sitting on the table, giving them a reprieve.

Nick stretched out his legs, not pulling away when his foot touched Stephen’s. He took a sip of coffee before speaking. “Is Lester going to put you in charge of the new team?”

Stephen gave Nick a look at the unexpected topic. “I don’t know. The conversation never got that far.”

“He’d be smart to,” Nick said. “There’s no one better for it.”

Stephen swallowed hard. “Nick.”

“We’ve only got one of Connor, though.”

“He’ll have to train some of the recruits on his equipment or be on call for both teams,” Stephen said.

They discussed the logistics of two ARC teams until their breakfasts were delivered.

On the sidewalk outside the diner Nick said, “I’m sorry, Stephen.”

“For what?”

“For pushing you away, for not letting you explain. I was . . .”

“Angry,” Stephen supplied. “I understand.”

“Hurt,” Nick said. “I was hurt, Stephen.”

The walk to the United Nations Plaza was made in a silence Nick didn’t feel like breaking.

Nick and Stephen met up with the others and waited until Billy was called in for questioning. The remaining four retreated to their usual spot at Ground Central to wait. Nick sat too close to Stephen and questioned Alan and Cross on their operations hoping to get some insight into how Evan Cross was going to respond to the questions put forth later that afternoon.

Alan stood suddenly when Billy appeared beside their table. He took Billy’s hands. “How’d it go?”

“I felt like I was defending my thesis again,” Billy said.

Alan pulled up a chair for Billy and they scrunched even closer together around the table. Nick put his arm across the back of Stephen’s chair. Stephen’s neck went pink, but he didn’t say anything.

They talked for a few minutes, making plans to go to dinner together to celebrate the end of the questioning, until Nick’s phone rang, followed by Stephen’s.

“What’s wrong?” Nick said when he answered.

Connor immediately went into an explanation of how they’d just lost two people on the other side of an anomaly that hadn’t given any indication of being ready to close or unstable. From the grim expression on his face, Nick guessed that Stephen was getting the same report from someone else.

Nick made arrangements to call Connor back when they reached the privacy of their suite. He texted Lester and told the others they had an emergency. Alan, Billy, and Cross accompanied them back to the suite where Nick Skyped Connor and Stephen set up a work space. Nick figured there was no time like the present to put their agreement to cooperate into practice, so he had Alan and Cross call their respective teams to find out if anything weird had happened in their area.

Nick and Stephen got filled in more fully by Connor and Abby: Captain Becker and Sheila had stepped through the anomaly after they’d used the rover to make sure it was clear. Before they’d even had a chance to send anyone else through, the anomaly had snapped closed.

“Someone’s controlling it,” Nick said at the same time Stephen said, “Someone opened it.”

They looked at each other, and Nick felt a surge of warmth. He’d never been so in tune with anyone as he had been with Stephen. Nick ordered Connor to re-open the anomaly and get their people back, and then to figure out where the signal had come from. Lester called Nick when they broke for lunch and Nick filled him in on what they knew so far.

By the time Cross called later that afternoon to let them know he was out of questioning, Nick had heard back from Connor that they’d retrieved their team members and were closing in on the person who had been controlling the anomaly.

“It’s probably Helen,” Stephen said.

“We’ll deal with that when we have to.”

With their people back safe, Alan and Billy left to ‘freshen up’ before dinner. Stephen and Nick shared a smile after they left. Billy had ordered an assortment of sandwiches and cut fruit from room service earlier, but Nick had been too wound up to eat. Now he loaded up a plate with half a ham and cheese sandwich, cubes of watermelon and pineapple, and a few grapes that rolled around the plate.

Stephen put the television on a mindless movie so they could have a brief respite from reality, and also fixed himself a plate. Lester returned and picked at the remaining fruit.

Nick expanded on the texts he’d sent informing Lester that the emergency had come to a happy conclusion, and Lester told them what he could about that day’s question and discussion sessions.

When Lester went to his room to actually freshen up, Stephen took their plates to the room service tray. Nick cowardly took that moment to speak.

“I’ve missed you, Stephen.” Nick sensed Stephen go motionless behind him. “I didn’t realize how much until you were there again, filling that Stephen-shaped hole.”

“Nick.”

Nick stood, wiping his palms on his slacks. “You deserve to know that. I’m going to go freshen up, too.”

Nick took his time. He washed his face and brushed his teeth. He changed into a clean shirt. When he stepped out of the bedroom Stephen and Lester were talking. They both glanced in his direction, but only Stephen’s gaze held a hint of interest.

Nick’s belly did a flip flop. He hid it by asking what they were talking about.

“The future of the ARC,” Lester said ominously.

Stephen excused himself to take his turn in the bathroom.

“Who do you think should lead the new team?” Lester said when the door had closed behind Stephen.

“Stephen,” Nick said immediately.

“Because you don’t want him on your team?”

“Because he’s the best person for the job. He’s got the experience and I’ve seen him with the recruits. Actually,” Nick said, “it might not hurt to have some of the recruits cycle through my team so they get to work with a more experience team before going out on their own. There was a quick trial by fire for this batch of recruits, but that shouldn’t be the case for any others.”

“It’s a lot to consider,” Lester said.

“Yes,” Nick agreed.

Lester left Nick alone to wonder what Stephen had thought about his confession. It was ironic, since Nick hadn’t given him a chance to respond earlier. Part of him didn’t want to know because he was afraid he’d screwed things up between them beyond repair.

Nick glanced up when Stephen came out of the bedroom. He’d fixed his hair (which made Nick wonder if he should’ve bothered with his own) and had changed into a blue pullover that hugged his chest and showed off his eyes.

“Lester gone?” Stephen said.

“Yes,” Nick said, suddenly feeling nervous about being alone with Stephen. He checked his watch. “We should get going.” If they were early they could get a drink. Hopefully the restaurant would be busy enough to make conversation difficult. Nick stood.

“Nick.” When Nick didn’t say anything, Stephen touched his arm.

Nick forced himself to meet Stephen’s eyes.

“I missed you, too,” Stephen said.

Stephen walked past Nick, leaving him to catch his breath. Nick grabbed his jacket off the chair where he’d thrown it earlier that day and followed Stephen to the door. He couldn’t stop his gaze from dropping to the bottom of Stephen’s jacket where it fell just above the tantalizing curve of his ass. Nick jerked his eyes back up as if Stephen might turn around and catch him.

Stephen did most of the talking, pointing out landmarks as they passed them and telling Nick about them. The only thing required of Nick was the occasional hum to let Stephen know he was listening. It gave Nick time to enjoy Stephen’s presence beside him and to ponder whether there was a deeper meaning behind Stephen’s words.

Cross was already at the restaurant and Nick was grateful for his presence. They ordered drinks and talked about things that had nothing to do with anomalies or dinosaurs – football and travel and universities. Billy and Alan arrived, Billy looking more relaxed than he had after his testimony and Alan with a flush on his cheeks. They added their thoughts about universities and told stories about some of the digs they’d been on.

The company was nice and the food delicious, and so they lingered over coffee and after dinner drinks. Stephen ordered a dessert that he shared with Nick.

Stephen mentioned that he’d read the book Alan and Billy had written about their experiences after Isla Sorna. “I got the impression that you were through with living dinosaurs.”

Nick was reminded of the scars that Billy didn’t try to hide.

“You’d think people would understand why I never wanted to see a living dinosaur face-to-face again,” Alan said. “But when the President calls upon your ‘expertise’ you don’t say no.”

Cross had been staring off into the distance and Nick hadn’t thought he’d been paying attention. He was startled when Cross spoke.

“I know how you feel,” Cross said. “This UN Conference was a good idea. We should’ve been sharing information from the beginning.”

Cross didn’t blame anyone specifically, but his gaze slid to Nick before dropping to the drink in his hand. He threw the drink back and set the glass on the table with a thunk that made Nick wince. “Goodnight, gentlemen,” Cross said as he rose.

Nick watched Cross make his way through the restaurant with a steady gait that didn’t reveal the number of drinks he’d had. Everyone was silent for a moment.

“Are you going to say ‘I told you so’?” Nick said.

“No,” Stephen said. “I’ve had some time to think. Knowing about the existence of anomalies wouldn’t necessarily prepare you for the reality of them. I think that’s been borne out now that the anomalies are opening around the world. And it’s not as if either you or I had the authority to make the decision anyway.”

Nick nodded, more to indicate that he’d heard Stephen than that he agreed with him. “I guess it’s a moot point now,” he said. “You’d have to be living in a cave to have not heard about the anomalies now.”

They stayed at the table a while longer. It seemed that none of them wanted to end the evening on that note.

Stephen said, “At least none of us have to sit through a week-long conference,” and they all drank to that. He glanced slyly at Nick. “Though I’d pay good money to see Cutter tell off one of the ambassadors.”

“Don’t be a brat, Stephen,” Nick said, heat rising his cheeks.

Stephen smirked at Nick, but he replied to Billy’s, “Oh my god, Alan, too!” and it became a competition to see who could tell the wildest stories about their ‘mentor’.

Nick leaned in close to whisper, “I’m going to bloody kill you, Stephen.”

Stephen just smiled and didn’t pull away.

~*~*~*~

Not knowing whether they’d be called on to go back and answer more questions the next day, they finally called it a night. Nick and Stephen chose to walk back to their hotel in hopes of burning off some of the alcohol they’d drank.

Nick used the time to think about Stephen, and how normal things had felt once he’d stopped harboring the hurt he’d felt when he found out about Stephen and Helen. Reconciling with Stephen felt . . . nice. Nick couldn’t help also thinking about Stephen’s confession, though he tried very hard not to.

The suite was quiet when they returned. Lester was either still at dinner or had turned in. Neither of them suggested turning on the television and they both proceeded to the bedroom they shared.

Nick closed the door behind himself and he tried to make his tongue form the words racing in his head. He watched Stephen take off his jacket and toss it over the back of a chair. When Stephen headed for the bathroom Nick’s tongue became unstuck.

“Stephen.”

Stephen stopped and looked at Nick. He couldn’t look at Stephen when he said this, so Nick pretended to need all his focus to remove his own jacket.

“Do you . . . ,” Nick began, then back-tracked. “Have I utterly ruined our friendship?”

“No,” Stephen said, adding, “Not utterly.”

Nick gave Stephen a look. “Do you think we could ever go back to what we had?”

“No,” Stephen said.

Nick’s heart dropped into his stomach.

“I don’t think we can,” Stephen continued. “We’ve learned things about each other that can’t be unlearned. And said things that can’t be unsaid.”

“Like that I’m a bloody fool who’d cut off his nose to spite his face?”

Stephen didn’t respond to that, nor did he repeat his confession, though Nick could tell they were both thinking about it.

“What do we do, then?”

“I think we’ve already started moving forward,” Stephen said. “Things won’t ever be exactly the way they were, but maybe they can be . . .”

“Better?” Nick said, trying not to sound too hopeful.

“Better,” Stephen agreed.

“Does that mean . . . ?”

“Mean what?” Stephen said when Nick hesitated.

Nick gritted his teeth. He supposed Stephen had every right to not make this easy on him. “That you . . . that we could . . .”

Stephen finally took pity on Nick. “If you’re asking whether I’m still in love you, then the answer is yes.”

Nick let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. “I’ve missed the hell out of you, Stephen,” Nick said. “And I don’t think I realized why it hurt so much when I learned that you’d . . .”

“Slept with Helen,” Stephen finished.

“Yes,” Nick said. “You know, if this was a romance movie, you’d have kissed me by now to shut up my babbling,” he blurted.

“Is that what this is?” Stephen said, moving closer.

“I think it could be,” Nick said. “If you’re willing to give an old fool like me a second . . .”

Stephen kissed Nick to shut him up.

The End

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. This is the hotel where Nick and Stephen stayed while in NYC: [Hilton NYC Grand Central](http://www3.hilton.com/en/hotels/new-york/hilton-new-york-grand-central-NYCMDHF/index.html). (The rooms have balconies that I imagine them sitting on. *g*)
> 
> 2\. These are the places Nick and Stephen ate: [The Comfort Diner](http://www.comfortdiner.com/), [Ground Central](https://www.ground-central.com/), [Darbar](http://darbarny.com/), [Herb N’ Kitchen](http://www3.hilton.com/en/hotels/new-york/hilton-new-york-grand-central-NYCMDHF/dining/index.html), and [Bistro Chat Noir](https://www.bistrochatnoir.com/). (I never named the restaurant they went to for their celebratory dinner.)
> 
> 3\. These are the places Nick and Stephen visited: [American Museum of Natural History](https://www.amnh.org/) and [Central Park Zoo](https://centralparkzoo.com/).


End file.
